He-Woman Man-Hater Club & Hello Nordstroms, can I speak to the manager of your shoe department please.

I attended a "Ladies" coffee this past Saturday. Last year Natalie and I co-chaired this event with two of our very dear friends. It was ridiculously successful, raising over $5,000 with only 15 {I think} tables. 

Here's the premise. Each table hostess decorates a table and invites 7 of her friends to sit at her table. Coffee or tea is served along with lunch and a dessert. Each attendee brings a gift card to a local discount store or gas station valued at $25. These cards are then passed out to local families in need through The Greater Brandon Community Foundation's Angel Program. It is a great program that helps support over 90 families in our community suffering from cancer or other catastrophic events. It's a great way to raise some money while enjoying a little "girl" time.

I know it's hard to see all of the beautiful tables but I did not bring my camera, so is the best I have, I lifted it from Facebook.

My Mom came with me because she supports everything I do from walking for almost 18 hours on my Relay For Life Team to being me decorating assistant in major events. She is unconditional and my best friend! 

Natalie and I sat at the same table and we both got laid! HA! Obviously it was a luau themed table. She sang at the "Ladies Coffee", and did a wonderful job!

Why all the quotation marks you ask? Good question! It seems that a few men in our  charitable circle found our "Ladies Coffee" offensive. They felt they should have been  included. Now these men are wonderful men. Men that go above and beyond in every situation. These are our go-to men but seriously, this is a freaking "Ladies" event! Oh, for all that is holy in this world take your penis and go cry me a freaking river will ya. I don't ask to play in your charity golf event, or your freaking stupid clay shoot or your poker run! We had to change all of the print from a "Ladies Coffee" to a "Spring Coffee" so they could attend and when I say we I mean me. Since I was in charge of all the print I had to do that and I have to say if you cannot tell I was a bit bitter about it! I was seriously peeved by this. I know money is money but I say if they wanted to be a part of it that bad they should have sponsored a "lady" that would have loved to come to escape life for just a few hours. A "lady" that doesn't have an extra $25 laying around. I don't know, here's an idea, maybe a  "lady" who we are currently helping , a mother of a child battling cancer or the wife of a recently paralyzed husband with 7 home-schooled children to care for {true story}. Now there's a thought! GRRRR!!!!

To make thing even worse they mocked us! OH YES THEY DID! They freaking mocked us! I walked up to the front doors and there was a camping chair in the grassy area near the door with a turkey fryer and a green Coleman's cooler. ARE YOU KIDDING ME?!!? They freaking deep fried their lunch at OUR LADIES COFFEE! And their table! Their table was a complete nightmare! It was decorated like a freaking men's camp ground. They had a stuffed turkey as the centerpiece. Ketchup and mustard in the store brand containers just sitting on the table, they couldn't even step it up notch and buy name brand condiments! Now don't get me wrong I love a good cookout but my Momma taught me that there's a time and place for everything and this my friends was neither! I had to lift this picture off of Facebook too so its not the best but hopefully you can get just a glimpse of the tragedy!

For the record, I am officially going Little Rascals on their asses and forming a 

He-Woman Men Haters club! Wanna join? 

I had to give a 30 second snippet on an upcoming event Natalie and I are doing called Cupcakes and Cocktails. It is a "LADIES" only event were we will wear beautiful cocktail dresses and sip on signature drinks and just be beautiful and girly! Like the coffee the entrance fee will be a gift card that will go to our charity. Great idea huh? This one is all Nat! 

So just prior to sitting down my shoe broke. My very freaking expensive {bought back in the day}, snazzy banana yellow, only been worn twice shoe, from Nordstroms broke! When I say broke I mean it freaking came apart. I almost had a ballerina slipper on the left foot and it sounded like I had on a pair of beach flip flops. 

I was wearing a very cute black and white dress and with these yellow shoes and a yellow clutch, it was just perfect if I don't say so myself!

Then this happened. Are you kidding me?!!? I am so calling Nordstroms as soon as life slows down  just a bit.

So I flip-flopped my way to the front of the room to the podium, which just so happened to be right next to the tacky men's table, to make my announcement. I talked about the event and then calling the culprit by name I told him that it was a "LADIES" only event but that if he really wanted to attend I may have a dress in the back of my closet that would fit him because cocktail dresses and stilettos are mandatory!  

It's a good thing my husband found their humor to be in bad taste or he too would be on my list and right now that's not a good place to be!

Happy Wednesday Y'all!